I apologize. I have needed some time to be selfish. I have needed some time to simply enjoy my daughter. Simply. It's difficult to comprehend that I could possibly love her more after each moment I take the time to consciously breath her in. I can. More and more and more. I watch her these days and I'm in awe that she is a live, breathing extension of her father and me. She's becoming such a little person. She's curious. She's silly. She's strong. She's determined. Most of all she is so happy.
She chats up a storm. I must say she is very convincing despite the fact that I can't understand what she is trying to convince me of, but I am convinced! She says "Mum mum mum mum" when she needs consoling after bumping her head or falling for the umpteenth time. She yells "Da da da da da da" all day long for no reason at all. I know she doesn't necessarily know what she is saying, but my heart stops almost every time. I want to pretend. I want Jeremiah to rub it in when she says "da da da" more than "mum mum mum." If I've learned anything.....you can't always get what you want. BUT there is still so much beauty despite it. It's not easy to see it all the time believe me, but it's there. I'm one of the lucky ones to have it stare me in the face day after day.